Wednesday, May 11, 2011

MOMS LESSONS

MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
‘If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME RELIGION
‘You better pray that will come out of the carpet’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL
‘If you don’t straighten up, I’ll knock you into next week!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME LOGIC
‘Because I said so, that’s why!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT
‘Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME IRONY
‘Keep laughing and I’ll give you something to cry about’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS
‘Shut your mouth and eat your supper!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISM
‘Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA
‘You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER
‘It looks like a tornado went through your room’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY
‘If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times; Don’t exaggerate!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION
‘Stop acting like your father!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY
‘There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT NUTRITION
‘Don’t eat with your mouth full.’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
‘I brought you into this world. I can take you out!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT ANTICIPATION
‘Just wait until we get home’.
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT RECEIVING
‘You are going to get it when we get home!’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT GENETICS
‘You’re just like your father’.
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT MY ROOTS
‘Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME WISDOM
‘When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.’
MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME ABOUT JUSTICE
‘One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.’

Written by: Unknown

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